As a boudoir photographer, I see plenty of lingerie and bras as sponsored posts in my Facebook feed. I was dying to know if these backless and strapless bras would work with some of my lingerie and plunge tops.

First up, are the “bunny ears”. They have a sticky silicone lining on the back. You place them on your breast and use the two tabs at the top, the ears, and pull up to give lift.

They do actually lift the girls a bit, but I also felt like they flattened them out a bit too. They ended up looking wider. With a traditional bra, the girls are lifted and shaped into cups but even though I bought the size that corresponds to a “D” cup, they still don’t give enough coverage to actually give the girls proper shape. They look decent enough in profile and could actually work with the right piece of lingerie for a bit of support. Sometimes, some is better than none.

Looking at my boobs straight on with the bunny ear bra on, it almost looks as though I’m not wearing anything at all. Taking them off wasn’t nearly as painful as I thought it would be. Holding my skin in one hand and pulling slowly with the other minimizes any discomfort.

On Humidity: I feel like these would immediately come off with a bit of boob sweat but it’s January in Florida and was 39 degrees this morning. No humidi-titties today!

Some of you may be familiar with the Misses Kisses backless/strapless bra. It’s meant more for cleavage enhancement than the lift of a traditional bra. It has a wire bar, with two adjustable paddles. The smaller the boob, the more the paddle will be turned in toward the chest. The larger the breast, the more the paddles will be turned outward. There are silicone pads that are placed on both the paddles and the inside of the pads in order to prevent the bra from slipping.

As you can see from the above photo, I definitely got cleavage enhancement. My problem, in addition to being a larger chested woman, is that I also have equally large areolas. Even pasties don’t cover them suckers up; I had to photoshop the remainder of them out for purposes of this blog post. 🤣 So, unfortunately, with the Misses Kisses, my areolas show along with my cleavage.

In addition, I get this weird cup overflow in profile. I tried adjusting the pads to no avail. It’s possible that I didn’t fit myself correctly and have written in to the company with a photo for feedback on fit.

I did try this on with a teddy that has a keyhole neckline and it looked decent in profile but my areolas would have been showing without the pasties. So, if you have small boobs and small areolas, the Misses Kisses should work great for you.

On Moving About: I did notice that if I leaned over with the Misses Kisses bra on, it felt like the girls were going to escape. They did shimmy a bit so expect to do some adjusting if you need to bend over at all in it.

I also noticed a jiggle while walking in it on, but I’m not sure if that would have been noticeable to anyone else. The bra did stay in place for a few dance moves, so if you plan on wearing this to a wedding, you’re probably safe doing the Cupid Shuffle, but you might avoid doing “pegging” or the “bend over boyfriend” dance.

On Sitting: I felt the wire bar but it wasn’t obtrusive or painful in any way.

If it does indeed turn out that I didn’t fit myself properly with the Misses Kisses bra, I’ll do an update.

And yes, I did try on both the bunny ears and the Misses Kisses at the same time for both lift and cleavage. It wasn’t pretty and I wouldn't recommend it.

Update

I sent my photos to the Misses Kisses customer support team to ensure that I had proper fit, and they suggested the following: “Try twisting the front of the pads up a little higher to the edge of the nipple. The pads act as a fake breast and should round you out on the side. For larger breasts, I often have women swap the left pad to the right paddle and vice versa. Angle the fuller part of the pad to the nipple. There should be no gaps and no indentation. “

That did make the bra look better under clothing, but overall, I find it weird to get used to while wearing it and will likely only save it for special occasions.

I can’t tell you the number of times that I’ve been shopping and looked at a dress or a top and thought, “Where the hell am I supposed to stuff the girls?” Duct tape is a breast’s worst enemy. Therefore, anything that requires strapless or backless becomes a no-no in my closet.

Most strapless bras are ill-fitting and don't stay up. Not to mention that most of them are downright plain. It seems that bra manufacturers don't want to invest in the R&D to develop a bra that would solve a wardrobe problem for a vast majority of women.

Don’t get me wrong. I love the look of strapless and backless. It just seems to be a look that is meant for the less well endowed, or those fortunate enough to have perky breast implants.

So, when I was scrolling through Instagram, and saw the Upbra, I had to find out more. Everyone has seen the stick-on strapless bra with the strings meant for pulling the cleavage together, and although you might get a little cleavage, it doesn’t lift the girls, and will apparently fall off with boob sweat (which is a given in Florida).

I was sure this was going to be another gimmick. The website photos shows of the bra being modeled by women with ample assets, but it was the before-and-after photos that won me over.

I promptly made the purchase based on my usual bra size without taking their patent-pending bra size test so when the first one arrived, I had to return it for a smaller band size. It is often said 80% of women are wearing the wrong bra size, although I couldn't seem to find a reliable source to support this notion. I gained some weight and assumed I needed to go up a band size. Who knew I was a 36DD?

Well, apparently, now the whole internet knows. If you’re a lingerie company, feel free to send me any new bras that you’d like a review of. (pervs need not apply)

Shipping is fast; the bra arrived in about two days. It definitely doesn’t resemble your typical strapless bra. The cups have some kind of panel in them that the breasts sort of sit on top of to lift them. After you put the bra on, you adjust the clips on the inside to adjust for minimum or maximum cleavage. Do take note: the more you stretch those clips, the more cleavage you get, but you also get more jiggle, aka the titty twerk.

I put it on but wasn’t totally sold until I actually tried it on with some clothes. It doesn’t leave a visible bra line, is quite supportive, and actually stays in place.

That means I actually bent over in it and jumped up and down. The things I do in the name of blogging integrity…

The Upbra would be even better with a slightly wider band and 3 hooks for support, and some boning in the band would probably help give the girls a bit more lift.

My Holy Grail strapless bra is one that will lift my boobs up to my neck and still stay put all day. What’s that saying? “The higher the boobs, the closer to God?” Oh wait, that’s for high heels. Well, I believe it applies to boobs too.

So, is the Upbra my Holy Grail strapless? Mostly. I’d still love a bit more lift, but if I’m being realistic, I’d need a crane for that anyway.

I welcome being able to introduce some strapless styles into my wardrobe. Oh, and Upbra, if you’re reading this, please make a black, lacy, strapless Upbra.

***Update***

Update